Deciding Who Should Participate in a Funeral
Deciding Who Should Participate in a Funeral
Any loss of a family member will be a sad and somber time, and these emotions can be exacerbated even further by the stresses of planning a funeral or life celebration. While everyone’s intentions are generally well-meaning, some families deal with concerns where certain members feel excluded or overlooked during this process, which only compounds the stress of the situation.
At McDougal Funeral Homes, our discerning staff is here to help with all funeral planning needs, including potentially awkward or difficult situations like this one. We’ve seen many of these kinds of situations, and we have a few basic tips we can offer you when it comes to determining who will be involved in both planning and executing the funeral service and all its required details. Let’s go over some essential themes to consider.
Be Communicative
Especially for large families, it’s a simple reality that not everyone will get to be centrally involved in the planning of a given life celebration. And while we know there will be some areas of stress or hassle here, these are minimized by simply being open and communicative with everyone.
This begins with the people closest to the departed, including spouses, children, siblings and parents. While we know the grieving process is most difficult for those in this position, it’s on them to be as strong as possible and take control of the planning. Communicate with others in the family as to how they can help – maybe not everyone’s role will be large, but everyone can feel as though they’re contributing with the right organization. Be as specific and detailed as possible in ensuring everyone close to the family understands what’s being asked of them and how they can help.
Perspective of the Departed
When it comes to assigning specific roles for the life celebration, such as who will carry out various readings or give a eulogy, it’s important to consider the perspective of the departed loved one. Even if you have petty differences with certain family members, put these aside and ask yourselves what your loved one would have wanted. This is not a time for those grievances to get in the way of a celebration of life that your loved one deserves.
Fill Roles
In general, expect that there will be more hands available to help than you could ever realistically need. For these people, it’s good to have a few broad jobs available to assign them – things like setting up or tearing down chairs, arranging tables, ushering guests, handing out programs or all varieties of similar tasks. All those who offer to help should be given a sincere thanks and a way to contribute to the service if possible.
For more on how to properly assign roles for a life celebration, or to learn about any of our funeral planning or other mortuary services, speak to the staff at McDougal Funeral Homes today.
